Me: "What is that AWFUL smell?"
Paige: "Earth friendly biodegradable plastic."
Me: "Seriously?!?!? At 8:00 in the morning? What the heck is that made out of?
Paige: "Cornstarch, vinegar, water and vanilla to make it smell better."
And I slap my forehead because I can think of nothing else to do.
The kids returned from three nights at their dad's house last evening and, I must admit, I forget how active they are when they are gone. They came back with a vengenace this time and the biodegradable earth friendly pastic was just the beginning...
My brother FINALLY popped the question to his girlfriend of five years which is something that I have been waiting for for the past four years. Christine (my fabulous future-but-really-has-been-a-sister-in-law-for-four-years) asked me to accompany her, Cindo (my mother), my sister, and niece to the Bridal Show at the Civic Center today. I accepted with glee as I am so happy to be a part of their day, but did mention that my tiny humans would be coming with. Christine loves kids and had no problem with them being a part of the day.
When I told the kids that we were venturing out for the day, they were elated to be able to do "big kid" things and agreed to get ready without any prompting from me. I was overjoyed by the prospect of not having to crack the whip to get them ready, that is, until I saw what Gavin was wearing...
Gavin is just as creative as his sister but in a techie sort of way. He loves video games and alternates between his alter-egos, "Mario", "Luigi", "Sonic the Hedgehog", and "Sonic the Werehog." Today he decided that he, most definitley, is Sonic the Werehog; blue shirt and WHITE GLOVES et. al. I tried to convince him that maybe the white gloves were a bit too much for such an occasion...to no avail.
Me: "Maybe we should leave the gloves in the car."
Gavin: "SERIOUSLY?!?!?!? I can't do that, mom. I am a Werehog today. All good Werehog's must wear their white gloves."
Me: "Of coarse, silly me! What was I thinking?"
Gavin: "Heck if I know!"
And I slap my forehead because I can think of nothing else to do.
As you can imagine, the kids and I being in public is much like watching bulls in a china shop. I am quite sure that we are all equal parts embarassing to those who have the pleasure of venturing out with us. After looking at many booths we came across the Allen Evans bridal booth that had many lovely dresses. An overly eager saleswoman made a bridal fair faux pas by not looking at the very important finger before she asked me:
Over Eager Saleswoman: "When is the big day?"
Me: "Just got divorced. Happily. Do you have a dress for that?"
And Cindo slaps her forehead because she can think of nothing else to do.
You would think that there really isn't much more trouble that we could get into...WRONG! As we hit the lower level for some more wedding fantasticness we met the one and only Jonny Handsome...DJ extrodinaire (Hawiian shirt included). Gavin and Pagie immediately ditched their jackets and started to bust a move much to the delight of Jonny Handsome and complete strangers...see video...
Unfortunately for me, and maybe fortunately for Gav, I missed the part were he got on the floor and did a break dance routine circa 1980. Jonny asked for me to send him this video and may get the gig because the tiny humans didn't freak him out, which means he can met the rest of us.
And so after a long day of good times with great people, we ventured home. The house still reeks of biodegradable earth friendly plastic and Gavin is tugging on my arm because it is time for him to go to the hill and howl at the moon (seriously...when he is a werehog, this has to be done).
And I slap my forehead because there isn't anything else that I would rather do.
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